Tear Drops on my Guitar
by lilyre
Summary: Songficishnot the song you think JPLELily has just finished yelling her heart out at James for carving their initials in her gutair. She loves that he did it though. 2 Songs. I think it is sweet, I'm very proud of it. Lilyre


Disclaimer: I don't have blond hair, blue eyes, nor am I English… now can we assume I am not JKR. Um… Not Avril Lavigne either… she is the writer of the first song: Thing's I'll Never Say. Not Martina McBride the writer of the second song: Learning to Fall…

Okay give you a good laugh before you read this… I can't spell worth anything I must have spelled guitar like 5 or 6 different ways (all wrong).

Oh and I don't use the song tear drops on my guitar in the story, it seemed to be the only name I could find to fit.

Tear Drops on my Guitar 

Lily had just yelled at James, about him being some immature, idiotic, prat for vandalizing her beautiful guitar. All those fallacies she yelled at him were eating her. He wasn't those things. She was. Immature, why was she so bloody afraid of admitting she was in love with him in a dignified way. Idiotic, he was being an angel for goodness sakes and all she would do was yell and turn things around on him. Prat, see above, she yells at an angel. And the vandalization, he had carved their initials into it: LE+JP. She loved it. But, every time she tries to be nice, she just gets nervous. Way to bloody nervous. So, in this case like so many others she went to the west tower, were few people came, and pulled her guitar in front of her (it was previously slung over her shoulder. She started to play and sing.

_I'm tuggin' at my hair_

_I'm pullin' at my clothes _

_I'm tryin' to keep my cool_

_I know it shows_

_I'm starein' at my feet_

_My cheeks are turnin' red_

_I'm searchin' for the words inside my head_

_I'm feelin' nervous_

_Try to be so perfect_

'_Cause I know your worth it_

_You're worth it_

_If I could say what I wanna say_

_Say I wanna blow you away_

_Be with you every night_

_Am I squeezing you to tight?_

_If I could say what I wanna see_

_I wanna see you go down on me_

_Marry me today_

_Guess I'm wishin' my life away_

_With these things I'll never say_

She had done this before, she wrote the song, just for him. Remus, practically her brother, always came to her, in the west tower, and held her while she cried. He always said the same thing: Tell him. This time was different. Why did it hurt so much? Why couldn't she say it?

_It don't do me any good_

_It's just a waste of time_

The door opened but the boy, opening it just stood there for a moment.

_What use is it to you?_

_What's on my mind?_

_If it ain't comin' out_

_We're not going anywhere_

_So why can't I just tell you how that I care?_

Remus walked into the room, sitting on the floor next to her. He took away her guitar and swept her into his lap. She grabbed the folds of his robes, her singing making way into sobs.

'_Cause I'm feelin' nervous_

_tryin' to be so perfect_

'_Cause I know you're worth it_

_You're worth it…_

She started bawling outright into his chest. He squeezed her tighter, in a comforting way.

"Why can't I say it… say it…" she repeated the words over and over again. Remus brushed the hair, out of her face. It was sticky from the tears. She picked up the guitar and rubbed her fingers against the place he had carved the initials, it was small; each letter, maybe the size of her pinky nail. Her daddy hade given the guitar to her before he died.

"He told you to write love songs." Remus murmured in his quiet reassuring voice. Remus always knew what to say. Of course she had told him when her father died, and when he had given her the guitar. She told him everything. But most important, he was right. Her daddy had told her to write love songs. "It seems perfect your love would engrave your initials on it." She nodded and smiled. He rocked her in his lap. He had been more of her father now, since her father died. He was only a month older than her. She smiled at this thought.

"Remus, when I get married…" She started.

"Yes." He urged her.

"Give me away?"

"Only if it is to James." He held her tighter. She nodded. "He's in his room." Remus dried the remaining tears from her face. He kissed her forehead, then helped her slowly up. "Go get him." She smiled, and turned to go, but he grabbed her hand, and put her guitar in it. He smiled at her confused look, then it donned on her and she smiled back warmly.

She wound her down and around the school to the Gryffindor Common Room, and ran up the girl's staircase, and went to her room. As heads of the school, both she and James got solitary rooms and a common room that attached them both. She walked into the common room. James wasn't there. But she heard movement in his room. She sat on the couch facing his door, and started to sing and play her guitar.

_I was alone in the dark  
Never let down my guard  
Closed the curtain on my heart  
So the world could not see  
All the demons in me  
Told myself I was free_

Then you showed me how wrong I could be

She started crying. The door slowly creaked. She sang stronger. __

Now I'm standing on a mountain of rubble  
That once was a wall  
Took years to build around me  
And you came along  
And you tore it down  
Like it was nothing at all  
Now it's a little scary  
Learning to fall

James had come out of his room. He was staring freely at her, resisting the urge to hug her. She looked deeply into his eyes. __

When you looked in my eyes  
Past the fear and false pride  
You saw goodness inside  
I can't believe how I feel  
I believe love is real  
And I'm ready to heal

You show me how right I can be

He walked closer to her, hearing every word she sang. __

Now I'm standing on a mountain of rubble  
That once was a wall  
Took years to build around me  
And you came along  
And you tore it down  
Like it was nothing at all  
Now it's a little scary  
Learning to fall

I was holding on, now I'm letting go  
I was holding on, now I'm letting go  
I was holding on, now I'm letting go

Now I'm standing on a mountain of rubble  
That once was a wall  
Took years to build around me  
And you came along  
And you tore it down  
Like it was nothing at all  
Now it's a little scary  
Learning to fall  


The last word was supposed to be held and full, but instead it was quiet and airy.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean it to hurt you." James said looking ready to cry.

"No." James looked a Lily confused. Lily rubbed her fingers against the carved initials looking at them. "It's staying forever." She looked. "I love you. I just had to learn to fall." He just stared at her not believing what he was hearing. Then Lily took her guitar off from around her neck. She put one hand through his hair, the other removed his glasses. She ran her fingers to the back of his head then pulled him in for a kiss.

The rest is history.


End file.
